I self-publish and if you don't have the time to do the research, you don't have the time to self-publish.
Even when hiring people to do work for you, like editors, people who make book covers, and people to advertise for you (all of which I've hired), you have to spend a lot of time researching who you want to hire. You might have to spend time putting packages together to help the advertising people or fixing the edits your editor gave you, or talking to your book cover artist about what you want (or spending days and days looking through premade covers and debating about which ones you want to buy in your head.)
It's about being your own accountant and doing the math regularly of how much you're spending versus how much you are making versus how much you will be taxed. It's writing blurbs on your own and tweaking coding.
You make your own web-site. You update it regularly on your own. There's blogging, tweeting, facebook, etc.
You have to spend lots of time experimenting on how to get your book out there and cheap ways to sell more books. So even if you hire people to put your book together for you, you are still spending a lot of time researching how to market yourself.
Self-publishing is about time spent not writing. Lots and lots of time because of little tasks that you were never expecting to have to do.
If you want what you are asking for, then you need a publishing house. Just keep trying and writing more books. Writing is about patience and it sucks up years and years of your life. Keep writing more books and eventually an agent will find you if you keep trying. It's just as hard to get people to buy your book when it's self-published as it is to get an agent to notice you.
I only wanted to self-publish because I like controlling my future-making plans and seeing them come true. I like doing things in my own pace and my own way.
I'm only saying this because it doesn't seem like self-publishing is what you really want to do. You seem tired from trying to get an agent, but like you'd prefer the control of your book and responsibility of marketing left to someone else. And when you self-publish, all you are is responsible for every little aspect of every single one of your books. You can't fling them into the world and forget them.