It's v-e-r-y good!
I had only few small comments:
I’m seeking representation for my 85,000 word urban fantasy novel, A WIZARD DECEIVED, a modern Arthurian legend told by Merlin himself, who is damn eager to set the record straight on his long life.On the day Camelot fell, Merlin Ambrosius was nearly killed by his legendary enemy, Morgaine Le Fay. Ever since, Merlin has lived a life on the run creating new identities
and blending in with normal society(obvious) lest he attract Morgaine's deadly attention. Today he’s known asMarcus Ambrose who and heowns a comic book shop in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, and . Heprefers playing Dungeons and Dragons with the store regulars to rumbling with fire breathing beasts of old.That is, until he gets some day-ruining bad news. King Arthur has escaped Avalon and is looking to exact revenge upon Marcus for his banishment. The Fates have disappeared throwing destiny itself into chaos, and as if things couldn’t get any worse, Morgaine has found him again and is coming to settle the old score.This is the part where Marcus usually packs up the old wizard’s staff and heads for another continent, except running for millennia has gotten rather old. Sure, running means surviving, but that would also mean standing up his first date in over two hundred years. It's time for him to live, not just to survive. (I think this way, ending with the stakes, it's more thrilling) It's time to face his past, even if that means confronting a mad goddess and risking the obliteration of his soul. (great!)A WIZARD DECEIVED is the first in a planned series with mythological cross-over potential, and will easily find a home with fans of Jim Butcher’s Dresden Files (italicize) or Kevin Hearne’s Iron Druid Chronicles where well-known mythology is given some fresh, fiery breath. Thank you for your time and consideration!Sincerely,Me.
Thank you for critiquing my query again .
Would you like to see my new version? http://agentquerycon...eturn-critique/