Thanks so much for the feedback. JoanB do you have a synopsis up for critique? If so can you send me the link? hannahb712 I read yours and offered some feedback.
The latest version of my synopsis is here. i know it still needs a lot of work. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
It’s been two years since fifteen-year-old JACK LARSON’S father went missing. The cops say he left town, but Jack refuses to accept his dad would abandon him. Jack feels if he didn’t know his dad, then he will never truly know anyone. Following his father’s absence, Jack’s mom slipped into a depression, leaving Jack to fend for himself. Jack’s busied himself since his father’s disappearance smoking cigarettes, experimenting with girls and drugs and hanging out with the local drug dealer’s son. They’re good kids, but Black Forest’s seedier elements make it a dangerous place to grow up without guidance.
After two years of hearing nothing about his dad, Jack is searching his father’s study for enough change to buy a pack of smokes when he stumbles upon a hidden file. Jack’s father was a psychotherapist at the county jail and the file is from a former patient who was awaiting trial for the murder of a local star black athlete. Jack learns from the file that before being arrested, the patient worked at the Black Forest Inn. There has always been rumors about gold being hidden at the Inn and the patient claimed he found it. The patient continually proclaimed his innocence to Jack's father, but knowing he would never get out of jail, he shared the location of the gold with him in hopes something good could be done with it.
As Jack reads the session notes he finds evidence placing his father at the Inn the day he disappeared. Jack finally has some proof that his father may not have abandoned him. He decides the best way to find out what happened to his dad is to follow in his footsteps. Using the session notes as a guide, Jack goes to the Inn. Once there he finds the gold, seven million dollars worth in fact.
Through series of unfortunate events, word makes its way back to the patient’s former partner, JASON ZUFELT, a six-foot-five white supremacist sociopath that Jack found the gold. Zufelt knew his partner had found something valuable at the Inn and has spent the past two years trying to find it.
Zufelt and his group of white supremacist cronies are now after Jack so they can get the gold. As Jack tries to avoid Zufelt, he finds out from one of Zufelt’s friends that Jack’s father was killed the day he went missing and Zufelt was responsible. The skinhead also warns Jack that his life is in danger and tells him Zufelt is the one that actually killed the black athlete, not the patient from the file.
Knowing Zufelt is behind everything, Jack reaches out to MARCUS FOX, a known gang member and brother to the star athlete Zufelt killed. Jack figures if he can appeal to Marcus’ need to avenge his brother his Zufelt problem will be taken care of. Together they devise a plan using Jack as bait. Marcus ends up killing Zufelt, but the plan does not go off without a hitch as Jack is shot.
Jack survives, but he no longer wants anything to do with the gold he now associates with so much violence and racism. He donates most of it to the Southern Poverty Law Center. He saves some to pay for college and uses the rest to start a basketball camp charity in Marcus’ brother’s name. He urges Marcus to leave the gang and head up the charity. Jack ends up quitting smoking and focusing on bettering his relationship with his mom. Jack realizes that he really did know his dad. He starts therapy with a colleague of his father’s and realizes it may take work, but he can have the relationship he had with his dad with other people.