Reaching into my pocket, I pull out the silver pocket watch, my thumb instinctively grazing the engraved words on the metal back plate.
You can think of me when you look at the time…
Goddamit, I always do.
I’m always thinking, deliberating, wondering about her.
I wonder if she’s happy. I wonder if there’s another man who is doing that for her. I wonder if he somehow accomplished what I apparently could not.
For so long I’ve been wondering what the hell happened. What caused it all to unravel?
I’m done wondering.
I’m going to find out the truth.
This flight is long enough as it is. Add to the mix my slightly inebriated state and neurotic thoughts, and it feels like it’s taking a million lifetimes.
Reaching for my snifter of scotch, I take a hard long sip, relishing the throat burning sensation.
With a quiet inhalation, I stare down at the watch again.
This is my last remnant of what we could have been. This is the one thing I haven’t been able to part with. Because every time I pull out this hunk of gears and springs, I think of her. And I hate myself for it. Every. Single. Time.
See you soon, Mia.
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