Jump to content



The Journey (Fantasy)

  • Please log in to reply
1 reply to this topic

#1 heatherpeterson


    New Member

  • Members
  • Pip
  • 5 posts
  • Literary Status:just starting
  • LocationUS Northwest
  • Publishing Experience:None. Sorry Newbie here, but looking forward to each new experience life has to offer a writer.

Posted 15 September 2017 - 12:25 AM

  Hello, this is the opening to my latest and trying to ensure it catches attention, etc. Thanks for any advice, help, etc. ahead of time. 


Sitting on his throne, Odin had called together a council of the gods.  Huginn and Muninn, his ravens sat next him having finished their work and Odin waited in silence.  The chamber of Asgard glimmered like a glowing gold sea as the torches lit the walls. The floor in the center shifted between scenes of what was occurring in the other realms. The ceiling changed into a darkened night sky as the stars made their nightly appearance. As the gods arrived they took their rightful seats around the chamber. Odin sat waiting sensing the arguments and the divisions that would occur. Loki glanced to his father, smirking as he took his seat hoping to use the situation to his benefit. Having looked around the room Odin noticed only one seat remained unfilled. Knowing the person who filled it would be late to make a statement of her anger.

Clasping the staff with his right hand, Odin stood pounding it into the floor until the sound echoed. All eyes fell on him as the room became silent marking the start of the first council in over four centuries. “We are here today to determine the fate of the nine realms. Since our lasting meeting, we our existence has been forgotten. Mortals have made themselves higher than us."  Whispers moved through the chamber causing confusion as groups looked at each other. "Silence!" Odin’s voice thundered gaining everyone's attention bringing order to the meeting.   

#2 michaelblaine


    New Member

  • Members
  • Pip
  • 41 posts
  • Literary Status:emerging
  • LocationUS Southeast
  • Publishing Experience:None

Posted 18 September 2017 - 02:00 PM

Is this for a short story, or the beginning of a novel?  I believe that the value behind any critiques will depend on that bit of info  :smile:  :wink:

0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users