Getting better at fight scenes is daunting. Below is a spar between master and apprentice with a sword she is still learning to use. Mostly concerned with the translation from my head to page I guess. Too much? Too little? Do you feel you can imagine the movements?
...She nodded at his off hand. A rod of fire hardened wood with an inset stone, chipped into a sharp edge, a razor, was the most common companion of this brutish weapon she wielded. [Really having a bit of trouble picturing this item. What kind of inset stone are we talking about? Like a flint knifeblade tied onto a pole? Or an ornamental ruby/gemstone worked into a metal setting on the wood? Or a stone-tipped spear? Is the razor a seperate item to the stone with the chipped sharp edge, or are you saying that the stone was like a razor because it was sharp? Out-of-context, it's also hard to picture why a scene that gives the impression of an ancient far-asian dojo instruction scene is using such primitive c. 10,000-BC pre-bronze-age weapons. I'm sure there is an explanation in the story for why it's worth this young Jedi's (sorry) time to bother to train in the art of such a blunt, primitive tool, but right now it doesn't quite make sense, in isolation? Caveman-era tools made of chunks of rough stone don't seem to merit careful instruction like, say, a finely-made katana would? Like I say, there's probably an explanation. But in isolation it's hard to understand, and the weird choice of weapon it makes it hard to visualize the rest of the scene]
He smiled. [full stop. Shorter sentences and take care with tenses. Representing the exact amount of time a character spends on doing an action might be best done whilst remaining IN the point-of-view. Like, if someone smiles at you for just a second, can you mentally process it as happening for that duration, before they've already switched to a different facial expression? If the protagonist is experiencing actions being done to her in quick succession, it might be better to just represent that succession, because it can help us feel more inside her head? Just 'he did x. Then, y! Then z, too, before she could blink!'] for only a second before tossing it across the room. She reached and stepped for the redwood dowel, navigating it with her eyes to not grab at the flint piece wedged in its side. Her movement became a turn, dropping to her haunch [haunch is a word I've almost never heard used of a human body unless someone is joking. It's generally just animals. For fight scenes, to avoid distracting a reader, it might be advisable to use pretty common terms for body parts, even if in other scenes you might be more poetic in describing these parts.] over one leg and finishing with both the razor and the slavsword extended behind her.
“Balance.” She said and watched him.
In one lunge, the master cleared the distance that remained between them,[Full stop here instead of comma. Short sentences are often the better choice for action scenes. I know that's a hard lesson for those of us who really enjoy longer, flowier structures, and I'm in the same boat here. But if you CAN manage to shorten sentences, throw in one-word sentences etc, it can have more impact and dynamism] bringing down the long edge of the blade near her shoulder. A seer was trained to see, and Gren could see the advance in his feet. She could see his weight on his toes, the lean of his hips [I don't quite understand this. She can see his weight in his hips? Now I'm picturing a seriously pear-shaped, large-bottomed instructor, and it's unintentionally funny. Hm. Is this more about the way he is balancing his bodyweight, so he's deliberately distributing it to different points for improved balance? That isn't quite coming across yet, I don't think...] . It was a seer’s blessing of Magus to predict the body, to read the subtle nature of muscle on bone on intent on feeling [This sentence is ungrammatical. Have you read the postmodernist writer John Wylie? This sentence reads a bit like John Wylie. I'm not certain that's what you were aiming for...]. The body was a book written in a language the seers knew well, regardless of weapon.
Without thought, Gren turned to bend around the slash and brought up her new tool to take in the side of a knee with its blunt end. It was all in a breath, and when contact was made, she saw Nosek’s thin boot sole at the end of the razor.
“And speed.” He added.
