I'd love your thoughts on making the stakes clearer. [Feel free to read query first so below makes sense. ;)]
What she needs to do: Immediately, make sure she can keep an eye on him. Later, get Asher proper support before it's too late.
What's preventing her: To keep an eye on Asher, she needs Mom's permission to have him stay with them, but June's barely talked to Mom in the past few weeks and doesn't feel like Mom understands or sympathizes with mental health issues. Also, her own emotions in response to his suicide attempt; i.e. a lot of anger, confusion, etc. especially because he doesn't initially want the help.
Let me know if this is coming across in the query version below and if not, how I can improve it. I'm willing to make big picture revisions, if needed. :)
Thanks so much in advance.
NEWEST VERSION POSTED HERE:
Getting arrested for vandalism isn’t on the list of Smartest Things June Gerber Has Done In Her Seventeen Years of Life. Then again, maybe if June was told Mom’s dating for the first time since Dad died at same time as her older sisters—eight months ago!—she might’ve reacted better. Betrayed, June pulls away. Mom doesn’t even seem to notice, preoccupied with the rat bastard. As the pang for Dad resurges, June has to fight from crawling back to the same mental hellhole she’d dug after his death.
Desperate for at least one understanding ear in this llama-forsaken town, June turns to her curmudgeon of a classmate and coworker, Asher. Bonding with him over hair dye, hockey, and the loss of a parent makes everything else bearable. But then Asher withdraws to the point where he barely acknowledges her existence. The day he doesn’t show for work, June realizes something’s Wrong, yes, with a capital W. She finds him in his home bathroom, clutching an unopened bottle of pills.
June flushes the pills, but Asher’s less than thankful. June ignites with a confusing and irrational fury. She needs another, clearer head to help Asher find the right support: Mom. Maybe even the rat bastard could prove useful. All June has to do is cross the canyon-sized distance between her and Mom—before Asher makes a second, more successful attempt.
Also, I do crit back, but just give me the heads up if you'd like a crit. Thanks so much in advance.