Heya, hope my advice will be of benefit to you. Fair warning, my claws are long, sharp and merciless (there's a reason my avi is a flaming hand).
When Ember wakes from stasis she discovers she’s no longer the only Greater Elemental. Her nemesis, Caethiel, created his own in order to reopen the doorway into another world. But missing the elemental power that defined her, Ember is helpless to stop him. (This is way, way too jarring.
1) I have no idea what a Greater Elemental is, especially since the fantasy trope of "elementals" are specific to one type of element. Chuck out that title and give us specific description of what Ember is.
2) The "Doorway into another world" is super confusing because I don't even know if the world you're referring to is like our world, or not. Chuck that out as well, we don't need it here in the hook (we probably don't need it at all). Also, if you do throw this in, give us a bit more on why he wants to do that. Even the phrase, "Summon monsters from another world", or "steal riches from another world," makes a lot more sense than just making a doorway there.
3)"Missing elemental power". What elemental power? What even is that?
4) Why was she in stasis? Did she get captured and forcibly put to sleep? Was she just really tired? Is it the Greater Elemental equivalent of a spa day?
Hooks need to be crisp, clear and biting. This one just misses the mark and ends up leaving me really confused.
Once, Ember could smite
Caethiel’s armies with torrential storms and turn the earth molten beneath their feet (Now, why on earth isn't this your hook? Cut out the specific name, and this is a BEAUTIFUL hook). She’d been a champion, a defender, but now that’s all gone. (this is just a repetition of the last idea, cut it) After waking from stasis (I still don't like this word use. It makes us question too many things. 1. Why was she in stasis, 2. What was said stasis (is it like some futuristic stasis pod?), 3. What woke her up? Even if you just say, "After being captured and put to sleep..." and we know everything we need to know for it to make sense). , she realizes she’s not only missing her powers , but and parts of her memory (it needs to be singular here to be grammatically correct) memories as well. And no one will tell her why she sealed the doorway in the first place. (Doesn't seem important, and throwing this in there feels like info dump) After speaking with her mentor, Ember learns there’s more to her missing powers than just being cut-off from them. (We don't really need to know that she's got a mentor, and saying "there's more to it" tells us nothing, since we don't even know why "it" happened in the first place. If you were to insert something about Ember's feelings here, about feeling lonely and helpless without her powers, or something to that effect, then the next sentence is far more impactful, and the query flows much more smoothly). And a dark power, rooted in her nightmares, is offering offers (present progressive almost always sounds clunky) to fill the void.
With Caethiel’s Greater Elemental leading his armies (Here we have the issue that no worldbuilding whatsoever has been done in the query. And that's okay, we probably don't need it. But statements like this end up feeling out of place. We still don't know what a Greater Elemental is (and I'd toss out that term entirely, because 10 bucks says explaining what a greater elemental is in your query would end up reading terribly), we don't know what these armies are, we don't know who's at war with who, we don't know who Ember's people are or why they're fighting with Caethiel's people, etc. All you need to do is imply threat from Caethiel and explain why it's happening, and you can negate the need to answer all of those questions I just threw out. Even a simple sentence (spitballing here cause I don't know your book) like "With Caethiel seeking to dethrone Ember's king and rule the land under his iron fist, Ember..." And the reader's not confused, because those concepts are are perfectly normal and sensical) , Ember must decide whether to
wield the dark power and risk losing herself to the dark power, or earn her way back to the elements, even if it means uncovering the real reason she sealed herself away. (Again, this is just too vague and it detracts. Something better would be approaching it from the angle of her memories, and giving us more specific details. "Even if it means restoring her own, terrible memories of the monster she was before she fell asleep." Something like that.)
FROM ASHES OF THE PAST is a
multi-POV (No need to say multi-POV, that is literally a stipulation of epic fantasy. Single-pov epic fantasies are all but non-existant, and they're usually classed as high fantasy because they lack the scope of multiple people.) adult (No need to say adult, "epic fantasy" is an adult genre. If I read a query for a "YA-epic fantasy" novel, I'd just laugh.) epic fantasy [housekeeping- complete at 125,000 words]
This query is a bit bare. You have wiggle room here to help us feel more immersed. A lot of it is cutting things that make the reader confused, but I think you could also add in a bit more of who Ember is. Show us her personality. Make us sympathetic for her. You can also give a tinge more about the world, and what's going on. Paint a little picture of the conflict and why it's happening.
I think you're right to do a singular POV for this query (and feel free to call me a hypocrite because I doggedly assert that showing both POVs works better for mine). I
Hope this helps. Good luck and happy writing!
-I critique because I care